How to Communicate Better During Sex

Instructions

1.
1

Ask for what you really want. Many people are too intimidated to verbalize their sexual needs during the act, thinking it may ruin the moment. On the contrary, telling your partner what makes you happy in bed can significantly improve your intimate life.
2.
2

Guide your partner gently, rather than putting him on the defensive. It’s easy for a person to feel criticized if you imply they aren’t doing something right. You might say, for example, “that feels good, try this too” rather than “no, not there." You may assume that turning your partner on in bed is intuitive, however that is not usually the case. It takes effort and patience to learn what really makes your partner happy.
3.
3

Encourage your partner to verbally communicate her needs. Help her to feel comfortable letting you know what she wants during sex by making suggestions and asking questions.
4.
4

Communicate about sex outside the bed as well as in it. Investigate new positions and techniques together. Then try them and talk about whether they were satisfying. Talking about sex in an open, even comical and lighthearted, manner when not under the pressure of being involved in the act can open up the lines of communication when being intimate as well.
5.
5

Save major sexual discussions for quiet time together. Bringing up big gripes in the middle of have sex can cause hostility and resentment.
6.
6

Be open to doing things you wouldn’t normally do. If dirty talk turns him on, don’t be afraid to try it out. Variety is the spice of sex, and doing something new can help bring down the communication walls in the bed.